burn

so when is burnt beautiful?!
when it is intentional.
when it is purposefully planned.
when it is achieved at as the result of an artists' mark.

My favorite studio tool right now is not the hake brush, or the payne's grey pigment or even the lush Panpastels (although they are ALWAYS just a hand-span away!). No, my favorite studio tool right now is my propane torch; closely followed by my butane torch~

It hasn't always been this way. I view my current sensibilities of simplicity and frugality to several things, but despite many strong forces pulling me to these two sensibilities, they would cease to exist if it weren't for the base of their birth; my own personal position in this life right now.

Bottom lining it-I can create without giving a rip what the judgement of the world is on my creations!
(Yes-I said 'give a rip!' :)

Oh of course to a certain degree I care very deeply what the reaction to my work, my creations, my energies are as they hit the airwaves and enter the real world.
But, I have come to realize I can control those reaction no better than I can control my almost 21 year old sons' choices as he works on an organic farm on Maui.
Impossible; I think you all get that :)

It's only at 44 years old (sigh, 44 1/2) that I've come to fully understand what it means to not have this control of external reactions, actions and choices...
But, to have amazing control of internal reactions, actions and choices.
A paradigm shift if there ever was one!
Perhaps all of you were born with that discerning property; able to shut out external stimuli and just process the solid honesty from within.
You know, not give a rip! :)
This girl was left off a bit of that quality upon arrival :)))
Not a deficit by any stretch mind you~
Just a character quality that had to be learned and embraced rather than naturally selected towards~ (little sigh :)
And I'm so okay with that. I think it built me into the better 44(big sigh, and 1/2) year old I am today :)

And a person more adept at accepting and embracing the 'go for it' attitude she's coming to thrill at in her work and life path.

And a person more joyful in the adaptation as the transformation takes place! (watch out Superman, this girl's transformation isn't a phone booth bodysuit!)
So I show off my current creation.
What has most recently lovingly been born.
What awakens me in the night and fills me with overflowing ideas.
And I wait anxiously for your reaction.

But hold fast to my joyous love for it.

Because, I don't give a rip :)
in love. Trish!