A random babbling on creative spirits-

Random babbling on the creative spirit~painting, sewing, baking, boys, an irresistable God and the next 200 feet~

Thursday, June 16, 2011

one year

A friend recently posted this video to her Facebook wall. She's been going through one very difficult time just a few years into her new marriage.
It gave me pause.
A beautiful song.
But put into the context of this friends posting of it, and its association to the state of her marriage, made me terribly sad.
And weary.
And anxious.
What does it take to hold on anymore? What is that certain something that takes a person, a couple, to the end of the line-still holding hands, warmly, fondly, deeply smiling into the memories of life shared?

Today is my one year anniversary. John Tod Govaert and Patricia Marie Baldwin were married one year ago today.
A year's worth of stories could be penned here; stories of moving in together. of melting two household's into one. stories of my youngest adjusting. of his daughter choosing to live elsewhere after ten years of being daddies one and only. of my heavy travel schedule. of his dad dying. of our connection to God. of my church becoming our church.
It's been a ride. And wow, already one year.
But I am leaving all that alone.
I am going elsewhere for this story.
I am looking to the future from the standpoint of this second time around, second chance at love, second commitment of trust. And I start from a place of brokeness; a friends struggle...and step into defeat.
I'd like to believe that John and I have found the magic ingredient that will hold us together. That because of it you'll see our smiling, albeit wrinkled! faces shining out from the black and white pages of the Sunday 'celebrations' section of the newspaper in 49 years (50th anniversary, get it?!)
But it's not quite that; a magic ingredient.
And we are not exclusive to the potential success. My friend and her husband share the same odds.
What we have though, outweighs odds.
oversteps any magic ingredient.
supercedes all effort and will of our own.
I admit to it being born of maturity. and life experience. and truly, of getting it wrong the first time. all those things had to come before, in order to come to this place now.
for both of us.
I think each of us could've struggled on to the finish line in our previous relationship-finishing with that image in the newspaper. Yet, lacking the genuine, deeply passionate and joyous smile.
It is possible to plod on and get to the end.
It's just not pretty.
and not what God intended.
So to have gotten it wrong, and to be given the chance to grow up and grow right together, is a blessing. A gift unexpected. Truly grace living every day.

So what is it, you ask, that gives us this advantage? This opportunity to smile the genuine, joy-filled smile over the hard won, 'say cheese' induced grin that would've otherwise been the finish?

first we chose God.
then we let God choose for us.
God. Grace. Faith.
and ultimately, release.
to give not only our relationship, but our individual lives and the daily, nay moment-ly!, doing of these lives to the control of someone other than ourselves.
we won love as a result. the real, joyous, trusting and deeply grounded love you see in the few and far between wrinkled faces in your Sunday morning paper. We won. and we're gonna keep on winning. grace.

in love. for 49 more years. trish.


  1. lump in throat and eyes welling Trish! OXOXOXOX

  2. There is so much truth to having a common faith as the foundation that the years of marriage stand firmly upon. There is something about entering a worship space together, witnessing the brokenness and imperfections of the world, speaking words of forgiveness, clasping hands in prayer, singing words of hope, and seeing others around you doing the same thing, week after week, or day after day. I remember when we talked at my kitchen table about faith during your first marriage, and your struggles with it at the time. It is nice to see you have embraced it as a focal point for your life. As I look back on our 21 years of marriage, I can only say we have our imperfections, but we have a high level of respect, friendship, and a huge level of humor that keep us going day in and day out beyond our faith. My anniversary wish for you is that you continue to offer up struggles to God, and keep the humor of life as an added source of energy. Laugh often, hold hands, rub each other's back, sit in silence together, and understand that no couple is perfect. You will definitely win! :) Best wishes for many more!

  3. Thank you for this beautifully open post...it really did bring tears to my eyes. I'm so very happy for you, althought only meeting you at D.D. Inspired...you are just a very genuinely sweet lady!!

  4. Beautiful! Blessed! Love! God! Good! and many more to come..


  5. Lovely post, dear friend. And congratulations!! John and I have been married almost 18 years (this is my 3rd try, yikes!) and I have come to believe that, in addition to shared values, we also help each other be a better person. He loves me unconditionally (and vice versa) so that I am free to be the best I can be. And for possibly the first time in my life, I really like who I have become. I am pretty sure I help him the same way.